Tuesday, March 4th, 2014
Motherhood isn’t a breeze by any stretch of the imagination. So, why do we pretend we’ve got it perfected when anyone worth impressing is within earshot? We all have off moments. In fact, most us have a few off moments a day. Many mothers struggle with parenting demons – in fact dark thoughts and bad habits are more common than you think. We all have these feelings! Let’s absolve ourselves of our ‘sins’ by ‘fessing up and coming clean about the ‘bad’ things we mothers think and do! I’ll go first.
• Sometimes I HATE being a mother and on occasion have thought of opening the front door and running away.
• Sometimes, when they are really driving me mad, I wish that THEY would just go away… then I wouldn’t have to do the running away.. I am too tired for that!
• Sometimes I feel so jealous of my husband going off to work on his bike. He has 45 minutes of exercise on his way to work and then gets to talk to grown ups and drink uninterrupted cups of tea whilst I feel like I am about to start a round of The Hunger Games with no weapons and only 5 hours sleep.
• I sometimes look at other people’s children and think, “They are way cuter than my snotty monsters. I wish mine had better hair, less dribble, longer legs, less attitude, more skills in the sleeping department, less skills in the verbal department”. I sometimes think my children must be harder work than everyone else’s and I wish for quieter, easier, calmer children.
• Yet, sometimes I look at other people’s children and think, “Thank goodness mine are not as bad as that!”
• Sometimes Thing 2 may have the same nappy on a little longer than is considered, err decent.
• Sometimes I would rather see what is happening to random ex-friends on Facebook and complete strangers on Twitter than listen to my own children
• Sometimes I think I am a brilliant mother and my children are getting a great start in life at home with me. Other times I think I am probably an awful mother who swears too much and doesn’t give them enough attention/read to them enough/do enough puzzles/sing enough songs and they will grow up to be drug-addict sociopaths.
• Sometimes I let Thing 1 play on the iPad for an hour so I can get things done. He isn’t playing killing games, just watching Peppa Pig on repeat, often in Russian!
• I sometimes let them eat food that would have Annabel Karmel quaking in her boots. I’m not talking Happy Meals all week, just the odd tin of Spaghetti Hoops when the going gets tough!
• Sometimes I just want to lie on the floor and SCREAAAAM like they do!
And in case you were thinking I am a terrible mother – I have a few more positive confessions for the record:
• Sometimes I feel like I love my boys so much that I want to squidge and squeeze them till they burst. I pin them down and kiss them till they are screeching to be released!
• Sometimes I almost explode with pride when they perform on cue! When friends are over Thing 1 strolls in and completes a 50 piece puzzle in 5 minutes and someone remarks “How clever” I want to shout “YES!!! YES YES YES!”
• And mostly, I think they are the cutest and cleverest children in existence and want to yell from the rooftops to the world about how great they are – which in today’s world of modest parenting is probably considered worse than smacking them!
Please don’t judge me, just have a read and add your own confessions to the list!